rut roh, it's anger
who the fuck do i think i am anyway?
i'm queen policewoman of the world, that's who. i see everything going on around me and i will call you out with my inside voice for breaking the rules, disturbing my peace and order, putting your yoga mat down too close to mine or driving like an idiot.
i'm the fireball streaking through the sky, the swirl of madness in a big party night, the sharp object you bump against when you least expect it. don't piss me off. i carry the energy of my father, my mother and the injustices in my family of all generations past. as long as i have existed, these flames have burned bright. but it's all a carefully guarded secret.
who the fuck do i think i am? i'm an angry angel in denial, reluctantly opening the sacred cloak around my inner voice. if pushed, i will let it out despite my best efforts to suppress it and the cycle of regret, self-hate, and flogging starts again.
but this angry angel is a truth seeker on a path to find my light and cultivate some self-compassion along the way. this angry angel needs forgiveness, yours and mine.
so the next time i question what burns deep inside me, i need to look no further. i didn't want to believe that it could be true, but as i pay attention to the feelings stirring up, to the zing in my tone, to the energy in the words of my inside voice, i can't deny what is right in front of me. i've been oblivious to it in the past but it's obvious now... i'm simply stunned.